A Star Wars Virgin: My Questions Have Answers!

Yesterday, I posted Round 2 of my Star Wars challenge after I finished watching the prequel trilogy and I had some lingering questions and I wasn't sure if I would ever get answers (because I was NOT going on a Star Wars fan discussion board again).

This is where my brother in law, Rocco, is vital to my sanity. He has proven to be my own personal Yoda in this journey and I'm young and naive Luke. He's very wise and has a lot of insight into things I didn't even know were there. He has thorough knowledge of the characters, scenes, and facts about George Lucas and filming. It's been great to have an expert in my corner since I find these movies to have a lot of different parts and characters!

I think its worth stating that Rocco has been in my life for about 15 years. He is the husband of my older sister, Yana, and I've literally known him since I was 17 years old. And I have never, ever, gotten as many texts from him in those 15 years than I have in the past two or three weeks of me watching these Star Wars movies. But that's sort of the great thing about Rocco. He's not in anyway an overbearing person but when he's passionate about something...he's passionate. He always has insights into how movies were made and directed and unknown facts or has seen deleted footage...so I shouldn't have been at all surprised that he would text me after every one of my posts to drop some knowledge.

So after finishing six of these movies, I had a bunch of questions which I thought did not make any sense, some of which I would say could be considered plot holes. However, like the good Yoda that he is, Rocco sent me some answers to my questions and I couldn't help but share them with you.

Question 1. Why doesn't Obi-Wan recognize R2D2 in A New Hope? 

Rocco: Technically the appliance reference makes sense. R2 droids are extremely common and though droids become characters with us in the movies they are just tools. There is actually a very cool droid side story about how C3PO ends up with an orange arm in The Force Awakens. 

Question 2: How did the Jedi just end up using the storm troopers as an army?

Rocco: The Jedi investigate the planet that was removed from the maps (the scene with Yoda and the kids) and they discover a defect Jedi (later found to be Count Dooku...worst name ever) went there and had the clone people clone Jango Fett (Boba Fett's dad) into a clone army. The clone people were told by Dooku that this army is for the Jedi they will need in an upcoming battle. That battle is orchestrated from Palpatine with the trade federation as the "false threat". So the Jedi use the clones but they are also programmed to double cross the Jedi. They are also clones which is why they are so dumb later in episode 4...the gene pool is diluted. 

Question 3: What happens in between Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope? How come it seems like Leia grows up to already be involved with the Rebel Alliance? How did the Death Star get created? 

Rocco: Almost all of these questions will be answered in Rouge One coming in Dec. except Leia. They tried to shoe horn Jimmy Smits as her stepdad/rebel leader so she is essentially born into the rebellion but never told she has the force

Question 4: Yoda tells Obi-Wan that he should learn to commune with Qui-Gon (his former master) while on Tatoonie...what? That doesn't make any sense? Why would they put that in there if it never gets mentioned in the next one?

Rocco: Yoda telling Obi-Wan to communicate to Qui-Gon is Lucas's half- assed effort to explain the ability to talk to the dead via the force as Obi-Wan does to Luke later. There is actually a deleted scene where Qui-Gon talks to Obi-Wan from the dead but its stupid and rightfully deleted. The force can allow communication with the dead but its never really explained and this was a bad attempt. 

Question 5: How did Princess Leia get her message for Obi-Wan to R2D2 if they were suppose to be randomly sold at the end of Revenge of the Sith? 

Rocco: Its said that the droids are like ever present beings throughout the saga. Somehow, someway, they end up in all the crucial moments. So short answer...fate or the force.

Question 6: Why does Darth Vader interact with Leia so nonchalantly throughout the first trilogy but immediately knows something is amiss when Luke is present? Does she not have "the force"? Or if so, shouldn't he be able to sense something with her too? When Luke and company arrive on the Death Star to save Leia, Vader says "I sense a something, a presence I haven't felt since...". Is he talking about Luke?

Rocco: Leia had the force but doesn't get in touch with it. It can be said that she didn't ignite the flame before she met Luke. I have always felt that the quote you're referring to is for Obi-Wan not Luke because later Vader senses Luke when they are flying around the Death Star.

Question 7:  In the first trilogy...Palpatine tells Vader "We have reason to believe that the pilot who destroyed the Death Star is Luke Skywalker, son of Anakin Skywalker." Doesn't Palpatine know that's Vader? 

Rocco: Like Obi-Wan telling Luke your father died, technically he did and Vader is not his father. So Palpatine is continuing the long con that you are now Vader and there never was Anakin Skywalker. The dude is evil. 

He also imparted his wisdom on what I SHOULD be asking:

• Would an Ewok make a good pet?

• Why is Lando randomly wearing Han Solo's clothes when flying the Millennium Falcon?

• Why couldn't Kylo Ren kill two people who never picked up a lightSABER after he showed that he can literally stop a laser in mid air while talking to someone and giving orders to kill. 

While I still maintain my point that Obi-Wan should have recognized R2D2, it relaxes me to have explanations for my other questions. There is a lot to focus on and keep track of in these movies and it was tough to keep everything straight. Now I feel that I can fully move on and towards The Force Awakens with full knowledge on everything that happened.

So thank you, Rocco! You're going to be a great help for your sons if they ever grow up to love Star Wars...or...maybe they don't have a choice. :)

xoxo. 

A Star Wars Virgin: Round 2

Okay, we need to talk. Although I was thoroughly warned, I was not prepared for how much I would dislike the Phantom Menace. I won't say hate, I'll say dislike. There were two major factors in this for me: Jar Jar Binks and little kid Anakin Skywalker. You guys, Jar Jar Binks is the worst. He's so horrible I couldn't stand any scene that he was in. I really don't even know what to say about him except that I'm so glad he wasn't a large role in the other movies. My husband said he thinks that is due to the fact that fans revolted after they first saw Binks. The whole movie was pretty odd. The little kid was horrible, the worst actor, and then some of the cheesy lines were annoying too.

As you can gather, I finished watching Phantom Menance, Attack of the Clones, and Revenge of the Sith. After watching these movies I can say that I'm so glad I started with the original three because I don't think I would've made it if I started with these three. They're pretty good, some of the lightSABER fights were awesome and it was nice to get most of my questions answered but overall I wasn't as into these as I was the originals. I had to kind of make myself watch them and I admit that I fell asleep a couple of times during Attack of the Clones and we needed to keep pausing and going back into it.

I didn't like the over usage of CGI but I know when these movies came out this was a new tool to use so I can sort of understand being overly excited about it. I definitely preferred puppet Yoda over CGI Yoda, something in his character just got lost there. And was anything on the set real or were they all just standing in front of green screens?

Let's talk characters.

Anakin Skywalker is of course the main character of the movies. The whole point of the series (for me) was to find out who he was and how he became Darth Vader. The writing in combination with the acting was distracting me from Anakin's character. The little kid in Phantom Menance and then Hayden Christiansen really fell flat for me. *deep breath* I didn't think the puppy love for Padme was cute at all. I feel like they tried to write him similar to Luke but he came off annoying instead of lovable. I was so excited to finally see how Anakin became Darth Vader but by the time Obi-Wan left him to die in the lava of Mustafar, he was so annoying I couldn't have cared less what happened to him. I was unconvinced that his anger towards what happened to his mother would harden him and make him weary to "the dark side".

Obi-Wan was another character I was interested in getting to know more about. In the second movie, Attack of the Clones, I was afraid we were going to get another stupid love triangle with him, Padme, and Anakin so I can be grateful they didn't go that route. I thought his character would be more integral for me...bringing up Anakin as a young Padewan and showing him the ways of the Jedi. The delivery of cheesy one liners, I could've lived without but overall his character wasn't too bad. He had some good lightSABER fights but I didn't really root for him...I guess I was suppose to feel for him when he was so disheartened by Anakin turning to the dark side but I was kind of just like "shut up".

I guess Padme is another main character. Going into these I wanted to find out about Luke and Leia's mom but I was ill prepared for the long drawn out love story. In the first movie I loved Queen Amidala. She was reminiscent of Leia by wiedling weapons and leading her troops. She had strategies and was really intent on making sure her people were safe. I really loved how they bait and switched me with her bodyguard, that was pretty cool. Then she falls in love and she goes totally pathetic on me. Like I said before, I was glad there wasn't a love triangle I would have to sit through. What was with that scene where Anakin is watching her brush out her enormous perm in the moonlight. Really? Who WROTE that scene? First, you don't brush OUT curls ever and second, no. And in Revenge of the Sith shes pregnant and just running around worried about Anakin and she dies from "a broken heart" and "lost the will to live"...even for your two babies? Whatever.

What I Learned:

• Palpatine! He is sinister to the bone. He ended up being my main source of curiosity throughout the films. His character is what makes me think there was some sort of talented writers on these movies because he is what you want in a villain. I learned how he manipulates Anakin into thinking that the Jedi are bad. Although Anakin spent his whole damn life with the Jedi and Palpatine says this to him once and now he's convinced of it too? Wait a minute! Maybe Anakin was suppose to be written as a big dumb kid?!?! 

• If you are a Star Wars virgin, like me, don't make the mistake I made by asking a question on a Star Wars fan discussion board. All I did was point out what I thought was a tiny plot hole. I said "How come Obi-Wan doesn't recognize R2D2 in A New Hope when we see him spending all this time fighting along side R2 in the prequel movies?" Well, that upset the nerds. Within minutes...no SECONDs...I received answers like "Anakin owned R2D2 not Obi-Wan" and "R2D2 isn't a person, he's more like an appliance...do you remember the blender that you owned 20 years ago??!?!?!" to which I replied "Yes, I freaking loved that blender". 

• The Jedi Order is all wiped out by a single order to the storm troopers to kill them. Although, I really didn't care too much about the Jedi for this moment to make a large impact. Sam L Jackson's character seemed like he was suppose to be a main character but I don't even remember his name, to be honest. 

• The twins get separated as babies because of the order that killed all the Jedi. They move the twins to where Anakin/Darth Vader won't know how to get to them. Leia ends up on Alderaan and Luke goes to Tatoonie. 

• The meaning of the different colored lightSABERs is all in my head.

• Some battle scenes and lightSABER fights go on for 20 mins and then the really cool one with Darth Maul gets cut way way too short. 

Lingering Questions: 

• Why doesn't Obi-Wan recognize R2D2 in A New Hope? He even freaking says "I don't remember owning a droid before". And yes, even though he technically didn't own him, you would think he would still remember him! R2 is fighting along side of them throughout the other prequels. It doesn't add up.

• How did the Jedi just end up using the storm troopers as an army? Were they just hanging out and waiting for someone to tell them what to do? Because then Palpatine shows up and tells them to kill all the Jedi and they're like "oh okay." And then as we know they become Darth Vader's army...I missed something with that one. Like I said, I kept falling asleep. 

• What happens in between Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope? How come it seems like Leia grows up to already be involved with the Rebel Alliance? How did the Death Star get created? 

• Yoda tells Obi-Wan that he should learn to commune with Qui-Gon (his former master) while on Tatoonie...what? That doesn't make any sense? Why would they put that in there if it never gets mentioned in the next one?

• How did Princess Leia get her message for Obi-Wan to R2D2 if they were suppose to be randomly sold at the end of Revenge of the Sith? 

• Why does Darth Vader interact with Leia so nonchalantly throughout the first trilogy but immediately knows something is amiss when Luke is present? Does she not have "the force"? Or if so, shouldn't he be able to sense something with her too? When Luke and company arrive on the Death Star to save Leia, Vader says "I sense a something, a presence I haven't felt since...". Is he talking about Luke? Or maybe he's talking about Obi-Wan!

• And in the first trilogy...Palpatine tells Vader "We have reason to believe that the pilot who destroyed the Death Star is Luke Skywalker, son of Anakin Skywalker." Doesn't Palpatine know that's Vader? Why doesn't he say "Oh snap, we think you're son is alive!"

Overall, I think I can say all these movies were good for was to answer a lot of the questions that I had lingering since the first trilogy. They weren't bad but they definitely weren't good and they were no where near the first trilogy. At points in this movie I felt like they just threw in some old characters to be involved in the action for nostalgia? I'm not sure. Like Chewbacca? Why was he there? I understand there is a whole Wookie species but throwing in Chewbacca was just like, yeah okay. You're trying to make me excited to see a loved character. 

Anyways, I could talk about these movies for days. haha. I am glad I watched them! But I'm not quite finished. I'm going to re-watch The Force Awakens and see if there is anything I missed. I started this whole series-watching to figure out my own theory on Rey's origins so that's what I'll be stewing up next. 

Until next time, may the force be with you.

xoxo

A 'Star Wars' Virgin : Round 1

Twins, huh? I didn't see that one coming...but we'll get to that.

So I finished the first round of Star Wars movies! I watched IV, V, and VI and I have to say, overall, I really liked them. At first I wasn't sure what to think with the Han Solo chest hair, the corny lines, pouty main character, and bad special effects but I told myself I just needed to watch it for what it is and for the time period that it was. I got a lot of advice about which order you're 'suppose' to watch these movies. Some said to watch it by release date, others said to sort of mix the first three and the last three together, and others said to watch from episode 1 and on. I ended up going with the release date order because that was what I had always heard as the way to watch them, and honestly I had already started the first movie before I decided to do this challenge, so I couldn't start over. But I really liked watching it this way, I feel like I was right along with Luke Skywalker in his quest to find out who he is and I think that would've ruined it a bit for me if I would've  known everything ahead of time.

So let's get right to it. Let me take this time to mention one of my favorite exchanges of the whole series:

Leia: Aren’t you a little short to be a stormtrooper?

Luke: I’m Luke Skywalker, and I’m here to rescue you!

Dawwww, Luke! He's like a puppy. 

I think I need to start by apologizing for thinking Princess Leia was going to be this damsel in distress princess that everyone needed to save. Yes, she literally needed saved, but I pictured her to be randomly flailing around and people were going to have to stop and pick her up all the time. I guess I just only knew the gold bikini scene where she's Jabba the Hut's prisoner. But she totally kicked ASS. I love her. I mean, she was in the Force Awakens, that's true, but to me she was just another character. Again, I knew enough to know who she waaaass but I just didn't get the full scope of her until watching these originals. When she grabbed that weapon and shot off the storm troopers, I was impressed! And she kills Jabba! She's awesome. 

That brings me to Han Solo, if you'll remember my initial thoughts on what I assumed coming into these movies,  I thought Han Solo was a 'good guy' in my head that equaled me thinking he was a Jedi. I had all these visions that Luke was going to join them in their fight against the Empire. Boy was I wrong. I found out that he's a smuggler with a sidekick named Chewbacca and he's the one that has the Millennium Falcon! So he's on the run and becomes tangled up with the Rebel Alliance in the first movie. He then becomes an unofficial member. Anyways, I find his exchanges with Leia kind of annoying but I understand why he becomes an important character. I already knew he would get with Leia since in the Force Awakens, Kylo Ren is their son, but I wasn't prepared for all the corny lines and really wanted Leia to keep saying things like "into the trash, flyboy!" Also, all the chest hair...

I loved Luke Skywalker as a main character in the first movie. I didn't realize he would be learning all of these things about himself, I suppose it sort of mirrors Rey in the Force Awakens. I'm assuming that's on purpose. In Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi,  Luke sort of falls flat for me. He spends two weeks training with Yoda and all of the sudden he's a master Jedi? Okay... Even if that was believable for me, I still felt like he got a little boring. I missed young, naive Luke. The best moments with Luke are when he's finding out who he is. I did love his lightSABER fights with Darth Vader, particularly the one in Return of the Jedi. That was amazing!

What I Learned:

• LUKE AND LEIA ARE TWINS! I really don't think I ever knew this! I always just knew "Luke, I am your father". So this was a big reveal to me. When I watched the first movie I was anticipating a love triangle between Luke, Leia, and Han and we would have to see if she wanted the good boy or the bad boy. Also, didn't they kiss? I think I remember a kiss..so that's a bit strange but I liked this twist. And I was underwhelmed with Leia's reaction to the news. You'd think she would be like "Uhhh, Darth Vader is my DAD!". But she was just like "Oh yeah, Luke is my brother, Han, so you can make out with me now". 

• James Earl Jones is the Darth Vader voice. This didn't work for me since I equate his voice to that of Morgan Freeman, very soothing and reassuring, so I was never afraid of Vader. I get it though. 

• Not everyone in the Rebel Alliance is a Jedi. 

• Storm troopers are dummies. 

• If you're literally hanging in the universe at the bottom of a ship while escaping your crazy father who just cut off your hand, just use your twin super powers and have her come rescue you. Then fall perfectly into the small door that was opened for you. Works every time. 

• R2D2 is not a robot, he's a droid and he plays a very integral part in their fight against the Empire! Even if C3PO puts him down all the time... 

• Around the 3rd movie, my biggest question was "Why doesn't Darth Vader take off his helmet like Kylo Ren?". Besides just not being as gorgeous as Adam Driver (that hair <3), I found out that he actually needs it to breathe! I was also disappointed that it wasn't actually James Earl Jones...

So Many Questions: 

• So what happened to Darth Vader to make him look so scarred up and need the helmet to breathe?

• Why are there so many species on all these different planets? And how come some of the species need a translator like C3PO with Jabba the Hut, but everyone pretty much knows what Chewbacca and the Ewoks are saying?

• Who is this "beautiful but sad" mother of Luke & Leia? I know there is a Queen in the next couple of films...soo...maybe? I mean she is Princess Leia...

• What happened to all the Jedis?

• What is Obi-wan Kenobi's relationship with Darth Vader? 

• How did Darth Vader become Darth Vader?

• Who is Emperor Palpatine, really?

That's it for now. Is there anything I missed? Anything I should keep an eye and ear out for? I'll be starting the Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones, and Revenge of the Sith. I'm a little weary going into these movies because people always mention how terrible they are but I feel like I just need to see for myself. I need answers!

xoxo. 

A 'Star Wars' Virgin: The Challenge

Up until this point in my life I have never sat down to watch the Star Wars movies. Not really. I remember the originals being re-released somewhere around the time I was in middle school, and I went to see one of them at the movies (but it was really just to go to the movies) and I sat and gossiped with my friends for 2 hours. So I can't say that I really knew the story but I am a big enough pop culture nerd to know the main characters and the references of "the force", "Luke, I am your father", Princess Leia in the bikini, and Yoda...all that jazz.

My husband, though, he loves these movies, so when The Force Awakens came out last year he convinced me that I didn't need to watch the other movies to get into it. He was right! It was a great movie, and I think I knew enough to follow along. If I'm being honest, it sweetened the deal for me knowing that Adam Driver was going to be in the movie. Because I love him. I knew he was going to be a bad guy but I didn't know he was going to be THE bad guy. I felt like I needed to state that for my friends who may read this and call me out on it. :)

After we went and saw the new movie, my husband started bugging me to watch the originals. I held strong for awhile there until I saw a random article online written by some super fan who was trying to guess the origins of Rey. "Origins of Rey?" I thought..."What do you meeeaaannnn?". I had no idea how interconnected everyone was (besides knowing Vader is Luke's father...spoiler alert) and kind of completely missed the weight of seeing Luke at the end of The Force Awakens.

And just like that, I gave in and loaded our Netflix queue with the Star Wars series, determined to figure out my own theory of Rey's origins! I've decided to drag you all on the journey with me. I'll be watching the movies in their three part series and then doing a round up of my thoughts and many many questions.

Let me just state right now that I am in no way hatin' on the Star Wars movies. I do not intend to personally offend anyone if there are comments I make that you may not agree with. I fangirl with the best of them when it comes to Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter so I do not judge superfans! These are just my opinions from an outsider looking in, so to speak.

I've been told that I must watch them as Lucas intended starting with Star Wars IV: A New Hope and so forth and then watching the prequels. I have already started the first batch of movies and I'm almost finished with Return of the Jedi. I'll do my wrap up after I've finished it but I just wanted to introduce you to my naivety going into this challenge.

Here is what I knew/thought I knew going into this:

• Vader is Luke's Father
• Princess Leia is the damsel in distress that Luke and Han Solo will fight over
• Luke is the badass army-type-guy
• Vader = bad
• There's a round robot that beeps and people know what he's saying. But only a select few, like me with my dog. 
• Its lightSABER not lifeSAVER
• Han Solo is the leader of the good guys! He saves the princess and Luke wants to be like him!
• There are soldiers in white
• There will be epic lightSABER fights

I hope you follow along with me while I watch these movies but please don't ruin anything for me! Like I said, I think I know enough but not everything. I'm excited, I love a good series.

xoxo

Southern Charm Reunion Part 1 ~ What We Learned

Y'all...The best aspect of Bravo reality shows are the reunions. Cause everything gets called out, there's no editing of a scene to make it feel staged, its just them airing it all out. I LOVE IT!
Typically, I've found past Southern Charm reunions a bit boring but since this season was jam packed with drama we had a lot to learn! And boy did I get schooled on some of the things that were going on behind the scenes that were never aired. Also, thank God they're not squeezed into the WWHL clubhouse. Dang.

First off, since its so important to me, lets rate how they looked.

Whitney: B 
He didn't wear anything offensive or special but looked dapper enough for the stage.

Landon: A
Loved the red, LOVED the earrings, Loved the hair. Love love love.

Cameran: B 
She looked cute but like Whitney it was just kind of bleh.

Thomas: A 
Very nice, TRav! Looking pulled together in a nice gray suit.

Kathryn Calhoun Dennis: (?)
...I can't...

Shep: B 
He looked good, as always, but the pink shirt and the no socks got to me.

Craig: C
Looks great from the waist up but, homie, are you wearing jeans?!?

Here is my top 10 list of what we learned:

10. Shep put the moves on Naomi. Of course he did...


9. Cameran's husband "really loves" the show yet doesn't want to be on it. And has no problem with her airing their dirty laundry about their dispute about children? Whatever.

8. Shep tried to hook up with Landon when she first came back to Charleston! This actually surprised me to hear. When he said before that they drunkenly made out, I immediately thought it was back in their college days. Perhaps I was wrong on that? Apparently she wasn't ready to get back into something so soon after her life transition. So in that case, honey, you missed the boat. I don't think Shep has a rear view mirror when it comes to women.

7. Post hook up back in the day, Kathryn says that Shep is really well read. And that it was nice to  have an intelligent conversation, for once...ouch. I believe that was to you, TRav.

6. We learned that Kathryn is definitely NOT a gold digger because TRav only pays for her rent and gives her face wash for Christmas presents. (I'm still trying to understand that one, too)

5.Landon makes a remark about a whole lotta medicine in Kathryn's possession at Jekyll Island to which KCD comments that they were anti depressant pills and that actually made my cold hard hatred of her soften just a bit. No one should be driven that crazy by their personal situation.

4.We find out that TRav took Landon on a special couple's trip that he had planned with Kathryn Calhoun Dennis when they were together. Even Landon looks floored by this information. No wonder KCD hates her so much! (Note: TRav explains that they shared separate rooms AND he was broken up with Kathryn at the time)

3. As we dive into the "he said, she said" about Whitney and Kathryn Calhoun Denni's relationship, we find out that Whitney was hopped up on cherry flavored moonshine and THAT is why he got so upset with Craig for bringing up the topic. Nice try. It doesn't explain why he was holding a grudge in the sober hours of the morning. But let's just go on to say that does this really matter? He says it was a one night stand and she says it was 5 days...either way its not a relationship. There's not that much difference.

2. The Paternity tests get brought up again. Did anyone else hear KCD say that people were questioning the ethnicity of St. Julien? I thought that was so weird. We find out that the baby is, in fact, Thomas's. Phew, I was so concerned.

1. Craig never fully completed law school! He graduated, but he never turned in his thesis paper thus not being able to take the bar exam. I was FLOORED when he revealed that. This whole time Craig has been talking about taking the bar exam and being a lawyer and its not even a real dream because he's never finished one huge part of that. He really is a typical millennial. Come on, who do you think you're fooling? Also, does Naomi know? He never mentioned that part and in the finale he tells her he quit the job with JD so he can study for the bar! Oh Craig, Craig, Craig.

A lot of things were revealed on this episode that I wonder what they need a whole 'nother hour for next week. But I'll be there! And we're joined by a very preggers but gorgeous looking Jennifer Snowden. I can't wait to hear what she has to say about the things TRav was trying to make KCD think about her. I wonder if there is anyone else who will be there? Danni? Perhaps JD & Elizabeth? Kathryn says she was disgusted by JD's constantly bringing up the paternity of St. Julien so I wonder how that effects her relationship with Elizabeth?
We shall see!

Until next time
xoxo

Southern Charm Real vs Fake "Words of Wisdom"

Whether you noticed or not, I took a break from a recap last week. I felt like I needed to recharge my Southern Charm batteries and see the show for what it is...a reality show. I started to feel myself getting waaayyy too invested, upset, and defensive by not only what happened on the show but what people say on Twitter. I'm a fan of this show and having watched it for a couple of years I definitely have my favorites and not so favorites. But I see a glimpse of them every Monday for like 3 months of the year so I can't pretend I know anything about them as a person, and I just need to let that go.

I wish other people would as well. Twitter is like an angry mob for reality shows and people take it way too seriously. With all the hate going in this world, seeing tweets like that really upset me that we can be so careless with our words but I can only focus on what I say.

Okay, so that's my PSA for the day...let's get to the show. And boy did they give us a show. Was this episode not ridiculous? I'm here to break down the real vs fake in this episode for ya...so let's get to it!

Real Moments

• Landon has a conversation with her sister, Bam, about the website creation and her confession of love for Shep. She always seems like she's on the brink of tears when she talks about her sisters and her divorce. She's the oldest and confesses that she feels like she's playing catch up to her younger siblings with families and careers. I hear ya, that's got to be a difficult adjustment for her. She got married right out of college was married for something like 7 years and gets divorced which is looked down upon in her family. So now shes back to trying to figure out what she wants to do with her life, like most people go through in their early 20s but she's in her 30s. I do feel for her. 

• Craig admitting that all babies look the same. I feel like every guy says this about newborns. 

• Shep meets Cam for lunch and summarizes Landon's confession of love for him. Cameran doesn't even blink an eye at this news, she's like 'no shit'. She eats her french fries and lets him talk in circles about how it could or could not work. 

• He then has lunch with his adorable mom and talks about his future and settling down. He feels a little left behind because his siblings are settled and raising families. Sound familiar? Looks like Shep and Landon are on the same thought process with families. He tells her about Landon but confesses that it doesn't work when you are friends with someone and then try and date them. He says its missing a spark. His mom and I both disagree on this sentiment. However, Mama Shep just wants him to be happy. 

• On to the dinner party and Kathryn Calhoun Dennis says she'll take a bourbon instead of champagne. Shit, she ain't pregnant anymore..give the girl a real drink. 

• Did I mention I love Cooper? When the rest of the group starts to arrive he tells Kathryn Calhoun Dennis that she should just greet Landon. He's trying to encourage her to be the bigger person. My favorite line is "I'm not trying to make it a bigger issue, boo boo, but I'm just saying." Hilarious. But he's right, its a dumb argument. I don't even know why she hates Landon anyways. Because she wasn't invited to the roller disco party? Because she posted a picture of her and TRav together in London? Whatever.

• Also points for Cooper, he is literally the only man in the room that tries to diffuse the situation. From the very beginning of Trav's tirade he's trying to get him to shut his pie hole. Then even does so much as to pull him back inside when he chases his guests out to Landon's golf cart for an escape. Phew. More points for Cooper in my book. Craig sort of intervenes with a good point about TRav stirring up old issues between Landon and Kathryn when they were being cordial with each other. 

• JD shields his wife when things start to get heated between the group. Dawwww! Could they be any cuter??

• Shep literally laughing in TRav's face when he gets in his face. So amazing. 

Fake Moments

• TRav goes over to Kathryn Calhoun Dennis's house under the guise of seeing her new place and the nurseries but instead they left "night time nanny" to usher the babies out of the room so they can discuss the guest list for his upcoming dinner party to celebrate the birth of their baby? Huh? Just have a dinner party, why do you have to pretend its for your kids? Anyways, they get in a huge fight over the guest list and inviting Landon. Kathryn actually says "You know me, I get along with everyone." You do? This is the scene where we see TRav jump out of a window to get away from the fight with KCD...I just wish it wasn't on the first floor. 

• KCD gets a phone call from Jennifer Snowden and she acts like she can't stand the girl now. This was a really weird moment. Just because Trav doesn't like Snowden she all of the sudden just cuts ties with her. Kathryn come ooonnn. You've got to start thinking for yourself, here. I was a little disappointed in Cooper for being bratty in this moment but he said last night that he has since apologized to Snowden about the whole thing so all is well in my Cooper book. 

• Landon sits down with Patricia about the whole Shep situation. Ugh, can we not? This felt so forced and Patricia used some weird analogies as if Landon is the homely girl that no one could possible be attracted to. Even for a reality show, Patricia is over the top. She also tells Landon that if Shep isn't the one, maybe she should set her sights on TRav. In what world is he a good catch? I'm just being honest here. 

• The whole dinner party. I don't think the cast's reaction to TRav was fake but I think this was set up in some way. I mean, its not even a conversation that gets out of hand. TRav legit just starts out by complimenting Kathryn but then ripping everyone else apart. All of his comments come with insults right afterwards. And when Shep laughs at him for being ridiculous he really flys off the handle. He was either drunkety drunk or just completely playing it up for the show. I can't tell but Cameran says in the previews for next episode that she thinks they were set up and I have to agree. 

The episode ends with Landon, Cameran, Shep, Craig, and Naomi all piling into Landon's golf cart so they can get the hell outta there. What an episode. I think next week is the season finale and I'm kind of excited about that. I'm so ready to see the reunions and where everything stands and what people have to say for themselves. I'm also kind of ready for a little break with this show. There was a lot that went down. 

My final thoughts are we didn't see nearly enough Danni in this episode. She was around but we barely heard anything from her. She always imparts some sort of reality check for everyone but I think she was just trying to stay out of the way. I also have to say that I really like Jennifer Snowden now. I wasn't too sure about her at first and I have to say she doesn't get painted in the best light. But I've been seeing Bravo's website share some moments from the show that didn't air and it makes me like her a whole lot more. Editing can be such a bitch, can't it?

Til next time, folks!

xoxox

The Real vs. Fake on Southern Charm "Whit's End"

I just want to state on (digital) paper that Bravo can really skip the recaps in the beginning. We know what happened last week, its not rocket science.

This episode starts where we left off, which is Craig dropping a major Kathryn Calhoun Dennis bomb in the group's lap about Whitney having more than just a hooked up with her. We have to witness about 10 mins of everyone shouting around and yelling at Craig and Whitney storming off, I was dizzy. I really needed to collect myself. And this is basically what everyone talks about for the entire episode, so brace yourself. It's really hard not to think that they're all getting a bonus every time they mention Kathryn's name. It's sort of comical how people who spend so much time not wanting to be around a person, talk about them non stop. Bravo set up? I think so.

And with that, here are my moments of Real vs. Fake on this week's Southern Charm.

Real Moments

• Whitney's complete shock that Craig would even bring up the situation between himself and Kathryn Calhoun Dennis. He storms off and goes upstairs to his room and then leaves early the next day with Cameran, of course, his new buddy. I really think that he was blindsided that this news was shared with Craig.

• Craig bringing up the Kathryn Calhoun Dennis drama in the middle of a nice evening of hanging out. I gotta mark this as a real moment, because Craig is really a baby. That whole thing stemmed from a fight about how to cook steaks, for god's sake. JD was saying the exact same thing that Whitney was saying about KCD and all of the sudden Craig's just like "Oh you're just mad cause..." Yeah, I said those kind of statements in like middle school. Jesus.

• Craig's inability to gauge a room and see how awkward his confrontation with Whitney has become for the rest of the group. He keeps going, even after Naomi tells him to reel it in because he's just coming off as someone who just wants to start shit. He acts like such a little baby in this scene, its annoying. 

• Danni telling everyone they need to check themselves because there's no reason they should be excluding Kathryn but be friends with TRav. THANK YOU! I'm glad someone said it because it really doesn't make any sense. He's just as ridiculous as she is. We don't see Danni for the rest of the episode after that comment, I think Bravo executives stormed in and carried her out in a black hood for mentioning that on camera. 

• Did Craig really have chew in his lip while drinking red wine? I know you're in the mountains and all but, Gag. 

• We cut to Mount Pleasant where Kathryn is in the kitchen with Kensie and nanny Dawn. I loved seeing this little moment of Kathryn playing with her little girl and saying "She's waving! She's saying dadda!". Kensie is adorable and its really cute to see Kathryn as a mom because it seems like she let's her guard down and is actually normal for a moment.

• Naomi has a little heart to heart with her bf Craig about the Whitney situation. She was effing pissed that he brought that Whitney situation up in front of everyone. She's tired of hearing about the Kathryn drama and would like for Craig to stop pushing the issue. Why thank you, Naomi. You're so right with that. I guess the only people who can make sensible comments on this show are the 'non cast members'. 

• TRav saying that every time he opens his mouth it gets him in more trouble. I 100% believe that because you are a moron. 

Fake Moments

• Cameran forcing Whitney and Craig to hash it out right after their fight. It was awkward and I don't even know why it happened. 

• Mother dragging Michael through Charleston so she can slum it and go visit her one and only love, Whitney. Can we stop with the Patricia worship already? Especially after she says Whitney's loft looks like an ISIS prison camp. Is that suppose to be funny? 

• Kathryn Calhoun Dennis "disappearing" because she's SO distraught that TRav was even thinking about going to LA for TWO DAYS to hang out with Whitney. TRav calls Nanny Dawn because he can't get a hold of KCD and she fills him in on the situation of why Kathryn is having another nervous breakdown. Does anyone else feel bad for Dawn? We have already witnessed two melt downs that she had to be in the middle of, so who knows how many are off screen. She better be paid well. 

• TRav not going on the trip to LA to please Kathryn Calhoun Dennis. Stop acting like you care about her well being. 

• Whitney and Larissa, ugh, can we not? Everything about these scenes between them is so...I don't even know what it is. 

• TRav sending Kathryn Calhoun Dennis flowers. He probably has a florist on speed dial for every time he apologizes to her. And the standard card just says "I'm sorry" so it can be used for every occasion. 

Final Thoughts

• Craig really thinks that he was asking Whitney a question about the Kathryn situation instead of spewing it out like a high school girl who knows a good piece of gossip. Grow up. And honestly, between this episode and last, I think I really am watching a different show than everyone else. Everyone on Twitter was like praising Craig and how he handled it, its bizarre. He acted like a brat

• I love Naomi, she's good for Craig. 

• Another thing people were talking about on Twitter last night, was justifying Kathryn Calhoun Dennis not wanting TRav to leave her the week before her due date. I get that, I really do. Whether I was with the person or not, I would really want him around for the birth of his child. However, can't she just handle it like a normal person? Why does she have to spiral out of control and not take his calls and have nanny Dawn be in the situation to explain why she's mad. Uuggghhh. I'd be sick of it, too. 

• I think its time for Bravo to do some serious reworking of this cast. If the Kathryn and TRav drama gets dragged into season 4, I don't think I can take it. I'm ready to learn some new stories here. I'm sure the drama will happen on its own just like in season 1! Here is my dream cast: Cameran, Craig, Naomi, Elizabeth, JD, Shep, Danni, Landon, Cooper (where's Cooper been?). And that's it. So basically no Whitney, Kathryn Calhoun Dennis, and TRav. I'm over it. 

Well, folks, that's it for this week. The previews look good for next week, we'll see how this LA trip goes. If I'm being real, I'm ready to wrap up this season. 

Til next time!

xoxox

"Blue Ridge Mountain Blues" Thoughts on Southern Charm

Can we go back to last week's episode? When everyone was actually a human being instead of a Bravo TV employee? I was feeling really good about it, like I had an old friend back. But OH NO, we have to continue talking ad nauseum about why Kathryn Calhoun Dennis should be invited to events and included in everything and Craig continues his campaign to find out why Whitney really doesn't want to be around her.

I'd like to point out that I was tweeting along with last night's episode and I'm just thinking...did I miss something? Perhaps an entire season? Why is Kathryn Calhoun Dennis getting so much love while Landon and Cameran are being put in front of a social media firing squad? KCD has done nothing to make people WANT to be around her. She spent the majority of last season flailing around and trying to make TRav pay attention to her and put a ring on it while being mean to Landon and alienating herself in the process. What do they owe her? Look, I think its totally lame if everyone made a pact to not film with Kathryn Calhoun Dennis, I think that's a little prima donna of them, but...can you blame them? You reap what you sow, in my book.

Anyways, the group head up to NC to Shep's family home this week and here are my thoughts:

10. Shep invites Kathryn Calhoun Dennis to the trip up to North Carolina with the group, knowing she's not going to be able to make it because she's on bed rest. I think that's actually a nice gesture - she still feels included while Cameran and Whitney can feel superior to her in every way because they get to go and she can't. Win, win?

9. Cameran meets with a therapist about her fears on becoming a mommy. I know therapy is a safe place and everything but it seems like its time she had this conversation with her husband. There are only so many dinner parties you can throw on a man to distract him from the fact that you don't want children. Especially since he was never invited to the dinner party in the first place.

8. To that point, I'd like to point out that Cameran needs to stop harping on Shep about getting married JUUUSSSSTTT like she hates when people ask her about babies. Its annoying Cam, stop.

7. Craig goes to visit KCD and through a not at all staged sit down (You're not fooling me, Bravo) Kathryn magically confesses that back in season 1 when we learned she slept with Whitney and made it seem like a one night stand, she actually calculated her moves to not only move some clothes into his place but hang out with him AND go with him to a party she knew TRav was going to be attending, in order to make TRav jealous and compete for her. It worked. And not only that, but MAGICALLY Bravo has unseen footage of Whitney storming out of the party because Kathryn goes home with TRav. She said she vaguely recalls a nasty text from Whitney about her stuff being out on the lawn for her to collect. See...this is what I'm talking about, she has no feelings. She had a goal in mind and she was getting to it. How did that work out for you, Kathryn? Whitney was just who she needed to get to where she wanted and she could care less if she hurt him. This is why I refuse to feel bad for this girl. I say it again, you reap what you sow cause, girl, now look at the mess you're in.

6. Craig mentions that Cameran drank the Whitney Kool-Aid which at first I was like "piisshhaaa" but they do seem to be awfully chummy lately. I can't remember from the past seasons if they were ever really friends but a couple episodes ago they skip the party bus to drive together to Shep's roller rink party and then this time they take a separate car AGAIN to avoid the party bus to Shep's mountain home. It either has something to do with party buses or or just excluding themselves from the group.

5. Okay, so was it just me or did you get the impression from Shep that this group would be roughing it? That was the most gorgeous house I've ever seen. Like seriously, that's a house I would work my whole life to be able to retire in and its only 1 of 4 properties for Shep's family. I'm green with envy.

4. Shep calling his mom to about the mountain house and she tells him the fridge is stocked for his friends and a cleaning crew would be coming up after they leave. I'm speechles...I am without speech.

3. Landon FINALLY admitted that she did not invite Kathryn Calhoun Dennis to Shep's roller rink party. Okay, she said it. Can the Twitter lynch mob for Landon stop now and we can all move on with our lives? I agree that she was in the wrong but it really was not that big of a deal.

2. TRav pretending that he really cares about not upsetting Kathryn Calhoun Dennis by not going to Shep's mountain house. He insinuates that he can only stay in Asheville one night because of Landon. To that I say, since when you do you really care about what Kathryn thinks. Stop acting like you have her best interest at heart when all you've done is cheat on her. Go. Away.

1. Craig and Whitney have a little tiff over how Craig is cooking the steaks. "Did you put salt on the steak? I'M LOW SODIUM!" says Whitney "This is how I cook my steaks" says Craig. To which Whitney says that Craig can't cook and Craig gets his wittle feelings hurt so decides to blurt to the ENTIRE group about Whitney and Kathryn.

And that's where our episode ends. I guess they will be dragging this fight into the next episode. I really don't understand why Craig likes Kathryn Calhoun Dennis. I mean, I get that they're friends but...why?

Til next time, we'll see what happens in Linville!
xoxo

Southern Charm: Hold Your Horses

The episode starts out like it normally does, we see everyone starting their day. Craig is getting ready for his new job. He's dressed in a nice suit and wants to get into the office before JD so he can make a good impression. What he doesn't seem too pleased about is JD mentioning that sometimes he has to get his hands dirty. As JD puts it "put on some jeans and knock down a wall." I still don't get what this company is..I thought it was a hospitality group? Why are we knocking down walls? I can't tell if that was a metaphor.

Cameron goes over to see Shep and they drink beers. They talk about Shep dusting off his old real estate license to work together? This is news to me that he held a job at some point although I wouldn't be surprised if he just had the license and never used it. The one thing bugging me in this scene is that HE GIVES HER A BUSCH LIGHT! Come on, Shep! You're like 38, you should not have Busch in your fridge past the age of 25, I'm sorry. Life is too short to drink cheap booze, and he can afford it. 

On the other end of drinking, we see TRav pouring himself a bourbon and coke using Knob Creek. I'm sorry - that's the good shit, you don't mix that! Does anyone else agree with me? You don't need to be drinking Busch beer but you don't mix Knob Creek with coke! But I guess he can afford it...touche. 

TRav gets a phone call from Kathryn Calhoun Dennis about a house she wants to buy. She just happens to be in the neighborhood so she stops by to show him and get his stamp of approval. Also, she needs a co signer. He tells her this is the time to build her own credit. THANKS DAD! What a bullshit comment. So Kathryn Calhoun Dennis turns on the water works and tells him that she needs his help because she doesn't want her kids to realize he has a better house than she does. No, seriously guys...that's what she says. He invites her and Kensie to come by the plantation to watch him play polo.

Mother is planning her flamingo party. Its a boring scene and you don't even want to hear the story that inspired the flamingo party. The only relevance here is that Kathryn Calhoun Dennis isn't invited, since I'm sure this will come up again. I think Mother is cool and everything but I don't know why she's a staple on the show. I'm convinced its only because Lady Gaga tweeted in the first season that she loved her. 

Shep meets up with Danni and Cameron and they tease him about his dating rituals. Cameron also says "yolo" and lost some points in my book.  I need to sidenote here: Does anyone else love Danni? I don't know why she's not a main character on the show. Shes always hanging out and shes SO cute. I'm curious about her story! The only thing we really know is from season 1 that she dated Shep. Hello, Andy!? 

We see Landon out hitting some golf balls with her dad. She said she's been playing her whole life but she looks like me out there...and I've played like twice in 32 years.

So now Landon tells her dad she wants to open up a bourbon bar downtown but members only because everyone downtown are just dumb young kids who drink Busch beer or mix good bourbon with coke. But in the meantime shes working on an online magazine...okay. Dad seems unimpressed. 

He tells her to pick one idea. She asks him for investment money. He says no...and tells her God takes care of kids and fools. Mmmmkay.

HOLD THE PHONE! Craig wants to take Cameron to go RING shopping for Naomi, his new girlfriend! No, no. He says he wants to do the mature thing and take the next step. I'm shocked! Wait...okay...so once I stopped glaring at the jeweler with the stupid magnifying goggles on his freaking head, I hear Craig say this is a pre-engagement ring. A promise ring?? Are those still things? And he's spending $3,000 on it. Whatever. Cameron thinks since Naomi is out of his league he wants to lock her down fast. Good support there, Cam.

I could've done without the scene of seeing TRav shave with his shirt off. Thanks, Bravo.

He goes to visit Mother and kisses some serious ass to try and get her to invite Kathryn Calhoun Dennis to the flamingo party. She drinks her gin martini and doesn't budge. 

Now we're finally at the polo match and TRav is excited to see Kensie. 

Fake friend Jennifer Snowden pulls up in a Maserati...I'm not kidding...and they load all of Kensie's stuff into her car instead of taking the car that probably already had her stuff in it. 

So Kathryn Calhoun Dennis is saying that shes excited to have a family day with TRav...but then why is Jennifer there? 

JD and Elizabeth are at the polo match and excited to see Kensie, their goddaughter. But Kathryn Calhoun Dennis thinks they don't have her back. She thinks they took TRav's side. Which is stupid. 

They pull up and Kathryn Calhoun Dennis flips the fuck out because JD and Elizabeth are there. She says again that its suppose to be a family day, but again, why is Jennifer there then? I really don't know why shes so upset. Even if she isn't friends with JD and Elizabeth anymore, are they not still Kensie's godparents? She's such a bitch. 

Jennifer grabs a quick glass of wine and pretends she doesn't know what's wrong with KCD even though she just heard her bitch for the 2 hour drive. KCD packs up Kensie and takes her home...saying that if TRav wants to play checkers, than she'll play chess. Whatever that means. 

Okay, I actually felt bad for TRav for the first time ever because he says "Where's my baby" meaning Kensie. Ouch... :(

He makes a point of saying he's now not going to co-sign for the house and I don't blame him. 

So that's our episode for this week. I can never tell if KCD is really crazy or if shes just acting for the show. Thoughts? I think she's crazy. I think this season is going to be all about these two and I'm just not into it. 

Next week I'll be in Savannah, GA (having my own Southern Charm experience!) so I haven't decided if I'll skip a post for next week or just post it really late. 

Stay tuned for next time, though!

xoxo